Vandals - Aging orange Lyrics

I m Palm Palm head
and I wrote one good song
But that was almost 20 years ago
I tried and I tried to follow it up
But you know how those sophomore jinxes go

So I became quite bitter
as sales dropped like flies
No one likes these dumb songs
of racing cars and spies

Maybe it s my ape drape
or hippies in my band
But now we only tour in Arizona
or Japan

So after much thought
and a panel of experts
I came up with a brilliant little plan
I ll take out my frustrations
on one of these ungrateful new punk rock bands

Cuz I invented socks
and I invented gravy
I made up the cotton gin
but no one ever paid me

Why beat a dead horse
with a career that is cursed?
I ll just sue for royalties
on things I thought of first

Back in Ancient Egypt
many Pharaohs went to jail
for misappropriation
of my Phrigian scale

I said listen to Tutankhamen
you re driving me insane
it s obvious those bellies
are all dancing to Bloodstains

I figured out you owe me
and please try not to laugh
but every time I hear it
I get one more golden calf

So I ve bitten off
a sizable chunk
of the hands of the people
with the food

Now I m confined to the pages of Flipside
a graveyard of punk rock s 35 year old dudes

Cuz I invented socks
and I invented gravy
I made up the cotton gin
but no one ever paid me

Why beat a dead horse
with a career that is cursed?
I ll just sue for royalties
on things I thought of first

Palm Palm!
Palm Palm!
Palm Palm!
Ape Drape!
Ape Drape!
Poodle Head!
Poodle Head!

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